What day is it, again?
Am I awake? Asleep?
Why are my knees hurting? I’m too young for this shizzz.
This, my friends, is what I call a #hustlehangover
Yes, you have full liberty to call me an ass. Yes, I haven’t written in a while. And yes, I feel guilty about it.
I have a heart, ya know?
And, I love writing here about anything and everything–from the novel to my day-to-day and to secrets and behind the scenes peeks–literally, all of it.
However, I’d like to explain my absence and my hustle hangover, as I like to call it.
Work is finally slowing down with the school year coming to an end and I can see the light after the last final is given: the kids leaving the campus–I, skipping joyfully to my car, eagerly ready to achieve some semblance of a break before heading back into the office for some summer work!
In reference to work (as mentioned above), I mean my day job. If ya know me, you know that I work at a local high school in my hometown and I love what I do every day. I love learning new things and challenging myself, so the fact that I was hired here full-time after working here since 2009, I’ve never been happier. And I also am hungry for more. I want to expand my resumé here and do more than what I’m doing now. So I hustle for it.
But I have to tell you, ever since I was hired at a new restaurant and am now working late nights, sometimes I’ll be on my computer inputting data or whatnot and I can literally feel myself dozing off while sitting up. It’s the craziest thing–doesn’t happen often, but when it does, it always catches me off-guard.
I like to think that I’m invincible and that I can work and work and save and save and that my body will always be in synch with my mind.
But that’s not necessarily true. Maybe it’s as I get older that I’ve been sicker than ever before, or maybe it’s because I run myself ragged until I get sick, or maybe it’s because I’m sick for long periods of time because I never give myself enough of a break to recuperate.
I hate admitting when I’m tired or not feeling good. It makes me feel like a failure. Anybody else get this way? Eh? No one? Just little old anxious me? Cool.
So needless to say after working six nights in a row, from 4:30pm, 5pm, or 5:30pm past midnight on 85% of the nights, I have to tell y’all, I’ve got a massive #hustlehangover!
What I like to consider a hustle hangover to be is that residual cough, sniffle, body ache, or bloodshot eyeballs that seems to linger more than usual. It’s that achy feeling from your hips, down to your stiff knees, and past your cramping foot tendons into your little toes. It’s when you’re tossing your tips into your nightstand drawer, rinsing off real quick, and basically napping for three in a half to four hours until you have to get up for your day job.
It’s having to say no to friends, family, other commitments because you can’t find coverage or you have a meeting or you owe someone a shift to cover or you simply are so exhausted you could cry but secretly don’t want to admit it.
It’s dealing with people who don’t understand the hustle–that don’t understand your goals and your dreams and your desire to get things done. It’s hustling your ass off while you’re still young so you can relax when you’re older and not have to worry about health care or retirement or social security or whether or not you can afford that two-week cruise to Europe that you and the hubs want to go on.
It’s freedom. It’s intense and it will grind you down to what seems to be nothing…
But one day, you’ll wake up and see that you have that home you wanted. You have the children you wanted and you can provide for them and you already have money set aside for college (any CSULB alumni out there?!). It’s the vacation that you can afford to treat your parents to. It’s everything: every tear, every late night, every delirious morning, every ache and pain, every party you missed or things you had to reschedule.
When you have the right people on your team who understand your hustle, then they will understand that when you have time, you’ll be able to see them. To show them love. To be present and not stressing about a shift or a meeting or a deadline. They’ll get it.
So, loves, I may be nursing a #hustlehangover, but give me just a few days and I’ll be back on track! I’ve got a lot coming your way!
First off, the hubs and I are venturing off to Seattle for our one-year wedding anniversary, so I’ll def be covering that (make sure to follow me on Insta for my daily stories: @lovalenzaaa). And speaking of anniversaries, and I haven’t texted her yet but she may see this now, I will be doing a piece on how marriage has treated myself and my best friend over the year. And then, of course, I will be hustling to jam out more chapters of my sequel, XXIII!!!!
So stay tuned, my lovely humans! There will be freebies. There will be fun. And there might even be a YouTube vid to accompany them! Who knows!
Well, I do. At least.
Okay, enough delirium for today.
Stay well, friends, and never stop reading.
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